September
The month of September is one of beginnings. Schools starts, the air starts to transition from summer to fall. Even some day planners begin in September rather than January. For as long as I can remember September started with a Labor Day Pancake Breakfast at our local Christian school signaling school starting the next day. Over the years calendars changed and classes started before Labor Day but getting together on the high school campus for breakfast to share giant pancakes, grilled sausages and Hollandia Dairy milk with friends was the perfect start to September.
Then September 11, 2001 shattered our United States of America. I remember turning on Fox News while getting ready for work and seeing a confused news team trying to comprehend what just happened at the World Trade Center. As I sat at the edge of my bed, I watched a second plane fly into the towers. I knew it was intentional. I rushed to the kitchen to see if my husband was watching. Together we silently tried to comprehend what was going on thousands of miles away from us on the east coast. A plane crashed in a field in Pennsylvania, another struck the Pentagon. I remember quietly whispering “Lord Jesus come quickly”.
My sister and her family were preparing to move from Connecticut to England and I knew my brother-in-law had been making trips to the World Trade Center to get their family’s visas in order. I frantically called my sister, praying Bill wasn’t in New York City that morning, but she didn’t answer her cell phone. She was in a Bible study oblivious to the terror happening less than an hour away. A few minutes later, Sue was confirmed both her and Bill were safe.
Our church met that evening to pray for our country. Our pastor read from Psalm 46 “God is our refuge and our strength, an ever-present help in trouble…” little did we know that a few days later our family would rely on God as our refuge and our strength when my father-in-law was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Dad Brouwer was 62. Mom and Dad Brouwer had planned a cruise for the beginning of October, and despite the tragedy and uncertainty of 911, they were going on their cruise. It wasn’t terrorist that kept them from their taste of anticipated retirement but the death sentence of cancer.
The dark cloud of 911 hung over us in the following weeks. My sister was planning a move across the Atlantic, my father-in-law was fighting the battle of his life and dreams were shattered. I wanted to make one more trip to Connecticut before Sue moved to England but a friend lost her mom to pancreatic cancer three weeks from diagnosis. I was torn. My fear was terrorist would overtake my sister’s plane and I would never see her again but I needed to be home.
Every September 11 I somberly watch and listen as family members read the names of the victims from the 911 attack. My heart aches for them, and for my family. Four months later surrounding a hospital bed in the family room of the house Mom and Dad Brouwer built, we sang familiar hymns from the blue Psalter hymnal as my father-in-law met his Savior face to face.
Septembers came and went. My sister enjoyed a season in England, we mourned life without Dad Brouwer and pancake breakfasts came and went. Then another phone call. In 2012 my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer. Two of my dear friends had just lost their parents in a matter of months from lung cancer. I prepared for the worst but God had other plans. My dad saw six more Septembers, enjoyed piles of pancakes and sausages on Labor Day, watched LSU and Boise State football games, complained about the local weathermen and drew closer to his Savior.
In Southern California, we may not have the fall colors like the east coast, but there is a change in the air. A time of rest. The days are shorter, evenings are cooler and the sunsets are magnificent. September will always remind me of my dad and my father-in-law and those who lost loved ones on 911, but I am also be reminded of being in church on a Tuesday night hearing that my God is my refuge. He is my strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore, I will not fear no matter what the future holds.
